Be Part of Something Important
I’d have called him “innocuous” at first. Average height, glasses. We're introduced and we shake hands. We start talking about partners and kids and child-rearing philosophy.
This is one of the veterans they work with at G.I. Garage. Like so many, he came home from overseas after enlisting at 20 with no support system. He was married at 18 and he felt like after he was given 12 days notice to pack up himself, his wife, and their daughter and go home, he was unmoored. He felt fully unsupported an as if reentry wasn’t just a challenge, but a thing with no starting point before you’re expected to be at the finish line.
He began talking about how he needs community. When you go through things most people won't ever understand, it's hard to let them see all of that. He says it’s hard to open up to someone who won’t ever understand you. The feeling of judgment from the outside that you won’t get on the inside.
He keeps talking. He says these guys probably saved his life. We talked about how so many organizations geared at assisting veterans are stiff and impermeable. You can fight your way through them, but you never feel any sense of comfort or belonging. He says G.I. Garage is different. It's hard not to feel like you're part of something good and important here.
Then he mentions the meetings. He really needs them in his life and that is very clear. That group of people like yourself to connect with. A place to feel understood. A place where people are like you. He’s far from innocuous. He’s a real life story of a life saved.
To become part of something good, consider donating today.
“G.I. Garage is my Saving Grace.”
Another story of a discharge so fast that it's a culture shock. It seems more common situation with a medical discharge or those listed as "other" or worse. You can't help but wonder if some of that is intentional. If you don't show them where to go and how to ask, they won't cost you any money.
Today we have an older veteran. He told me that he was so reluctant to take the interview. Nerves and knowing he was talking to someone not "on the inside" made him want to cancel after giving his permission to send his contact, reaching out gently, and his scheduling. You have to understand the situation. It's the same old story over and over again. They found this place of camaraderie and acceptance, a place where they could go and ask for nothing, or go and ask for that hand they need; a hand that is always there at G.I. Garage. The only way to part of that is to live it. It tends to create the same feeling they have in the world at large: that these people don't understand and they're here with the intent to judge and parse and dismiss.
Research tells us that so much of the mental health issues with veterans can be prevented with a good support system when they come home. Maybe it isn’t that at all. It’s certainly not the case today. Our veteran came from a good home, with supportive parents, who were present and helpful after his discharge. That may be part of the reason he struggled with asking for outside resources.
He says he came to G.I. Garage by accident. It was circumstance. Nothing is accidental and everything’s a sign if you want it to be. He overheard a conversation between at an auto parts store, he responded about his own service.
When asked to listen to the sound his car was making and he couldn't hear it. Stephen knew it was tinnitus from his time in the service and asked if he'd applied for benefits as a result. The attitude of service people and people at large, really, is "I'm fine." It is so hard to reach out and ask for help because asking for help means admitting that you need it. So of course he hadn't.
Stephen offered a phone number and gave him the resource, and the choice, to ask. And he did. And he went back to G.I. Garage for a meeting. And he truly never left, no matter where geography has taken him.
It’s impossible to get over the heart in these stories. This level of vulnerability and passion only ever come from love. It's always the same. This morning's veteran says "G.I. Garage was my saving grace" and when you hear it, you know it's the absolute truth. Every one of us is here to make sure that we keep being that saving grace, that life saver, the place to go when there's nowhere else.